It’s not often that we experience people in multiple seasons of their life. What a gift it is to see people change and grow. What hope we have that they can see how I’ve grown and changed — or at least I hope they see my growth — or at least I think I’ve grown.

I had a chance to connect with a former boss recently. Our discussion was open, honest, humble. Our relationship in the past was fine — neither exceptional or terrible — it was a working relationship.

As our hour together stretched into 90 minutes, the sense of mutual respect and humility was palpable. This man is not the same man I turned my laptop into years ago. Rather, I sat with a man that had been refined by failures. He sat in an air of freedom of knowing — truly —who he is because he’d been through the refiner’s crucible. Here was a man that engaged his life and his business with confidence — con fide, with faith — of knowing that what he sold and how he served were true to himself and tried in the marketplace.

He recounted his journey with a tempered measure. Clearly, there was depth to the dark season that he had explored and found his way out of. And yet…and now…and still, he moves forward, neither proud of what he’s done nor beaten by it.

What a gift to see him in a different season. He had moved through some dark places and had done so in a healthy way. He spoke of the past as if it were amoral — neither with great reminiscence, nor great disdain. I’ve been in too many conversations of late with folks that are stuck in a season — stuck with the rotting jack-o-lantern of fall because they won’t go do the work to take out their trash. The rotting pumpkin holds them back more than the know. What’s more, no one else can smell the pumpkin, yet the stench of ‘stuck in yesterday’ reeks.

What a gift to see this man in a new season — in process — growing in wisdom and stature and favor with God and men.

While I won’t project what he saw in me, I know too that I’m in a new season. I was able to sit across the table from a fellow journeyman and be present without the context of position and without the pretext of want. I wanted the same thing from him that he wanted from me: an opportunity to serve through presence.

I’m grateful for this time and grateful that neither of us is the same.