Adventure is jumping headlong into the uncertain
Our wedding was fairly traditional: big church, big dress, big party. It was great.
We had an opportunity to personalize our vows prior to the big day, but honestly, we didn’t feel compelled to change much. The vows presented articulated what we felt toward one another more poetically than we could have written at the time, so we kept them. There’s a reason the wedding canon has stood the test of time.
We did change one word: "Adventure". It went something like: ‘in sickness and in health, in whatever adventures life brings, I do.'
Perhaps we thought it was whimsical. I don’t remember. I do know our choice is more true than we realized then. From the moment we spoke our intent and made our commitment in front of God and those we love, we’ve been on an adventure.
Adventures are, by definition, dangerous. They are, as Hank Fortener reminds us, 'typically hazardous'. We went for whimsy and got hazardous. Before we get too far down the path of articulating what it’s like being married to me, let’s take a step back and think through this.
an exciting or very unusual experience.
participation in exciting undertakings or enterprises
a bold, usually risky undertaking; hazardous action of uncertain outcome.
…but we wouldn’t change anything. At no point could we have planned how our life has happened. Honestly, I’m not sure we would have planned it this way had we the choice, but again, we wouldn’t change anything. The life my bride and I have is difficult, uncertain, tiring, and at times painful yet it is immensely rich and deeply rewarding.
There are entire industries dedicated to ‘adventuring.’ Companies exist to take your money and you out into the world on ‘unusual experiences’. They’re fantastic. A category of motorcycles are called ‘Adventure bikes’. They’re amazing. These segments exist because there is something within us that needs the exciting and the uncertain. We need it so much we seek it out and design our vacations (and our marriages) around it.
Adventure is jumping headlong into the uncertain. Certainty is boring. Routine is anesthetizing. Nothing is certain. The sooner we learn this, the sooner we can begin living. Even dogs know this. Given the chance, any dog will be 3/4 of the way out the car window, headfirst into the wind. Sure, the window should be rolled up and King Maximillian of Baker Street should probably be in a harness, but to a dog (and to his ‘owners'), adventure brings life. It’s exciting. Somebody will get hurt, sure. Do it anyway.
I’m just glad we committed to one another before committing to uncertainty.
Now, where’s my helmet?